Sausagey Santa (Avant Punk Book Club) | 
 enlarge | Author: Carlton Mellick Iii
Publisher: Eraserhead Press
Category: Book
List Price: $9.95
Buy New: $9.85
You Save: $0.10 (1%)
New (15) Used (8) from $8.35
Rating:  7 reviews
Media: Paperback
Pages: 124
Number Of Items: 1
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.3
Dimensions (in): 8.3 x 5.3 x 0.4
ISBN: 1933929561
Dewey Decimal Number: 813
EAN: 9781933929569
Publication Date: December 19, 2006
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
Shipping: International shipping available
Condition: Brand new book! Delivered direct from our US warehouse by Expedited (4-7 days) or Standard (usually 10-14 days but can be longer). Expedited shipping recommended for speedier delivery. Over 1 million satisfied customers
Tell A Friend
| |
| Similar Items:
|
| Editorial Reviews:
Product Description
Santa isn't the jolly old elf he's been described as in Children's stories. He's a bit more grotesque than that. His eyes are pimento-stuffed olives, his teeth are walnuts, and his body is made of sausages. One snowy Christmas Eve, while visiting the Fry family, Sausagey Santa is attacked by an evil force that is driven to destroy Christmas forever. It is an anti-Christmas spirit that loathes everything having to do with children and Jesus. After it steals his magic bag of presents, Santa calls upon Matthew Fry and his wife, Decapitron (a brutish warrior woman with a strange Christmas fetish and a candy cane sword), to help get it back and save Christmas for everyone. It's the greatest sausage-spewing, elf-raping, zombie-killing, Transformer-fucking, reindeer-exploding, snowman-battling, adventure-rocking, bizarro Christmas story OF ALL TIME!!!
|
| Customer Reviews: Read 2 more reviews...
 Christmas on Crack June 9, 2008
H. Lounsbury (Niagara, ON Canada)
The key factor to Carlton Mellick's success as a writer is his humor.
It's possible to get lost in the sea of absurdity that Mellick's paints. However, his humor tends to hold everything together nicely.
This is a North Pole loaded with sexual deviant elves, a nazi-Frosty, a Santa made of meat and chainsaw angel wings.
Definitely not your parents Holiday yarn. Mellick has once again proven he is one of the top cynical voices of our generation.
Try not to get too drunk this Christmas December 13, 2007
Lotus Rose (Austin, TX)
First of all, the cover, by Ed Mironiuk, is great. The colors are much more vibrant on the actual book. What you can't see on Amazon, is that on the back, there is a little snowman with hammers for arms and forks sticking out of its head. It's pretty funny.
Now, as for the story--this is a twisted take on the classic sort of Christmas tales that pop up a month or so before Christmas. It plays with the concept, though, because this is no sappy, sweet tale--this is a surly, irreverent version of Christmas where you leave beer for Santa instead of cookies.Can Christmas be saved? Do you care?
The style is concise, fast, and humorous. I laughed out loud at some points of the book. Mellick explores a lot of really interesting ideas, which is one of the things I liked the most.
So, may you have a Christmas. Read this book, and leave a beer for Santa.
--lotus rose
My book, which also includes a Christmas story called, "The Worst Christmas Ever":
The Corruption of Innocence
Awesome story! November 27, 2007
Alkamendham (Birmingham, AL)
This book is totally hilarious. The story is basically about when an evil Frosty the Snowman who threatens to destroy Christmas, a character named "Sly Guy" Matthew Fry teams up with Santa and the elves along with Sly Guys totally wicked wife, Decapitron, to save the day. Santa is a crazy jolly pirate made out of sausage. Decapitron is has a candy cane samurai sword and is a pro street fighter. The elves are obsessed with dressing up like Dungeons & Dragons characters. And Frosty....well you'll just have to read the book to learn about Frosty.
This book is like South Park, Futurama, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and The Night Before Christmas all wrapped together with a giant chainsaw bow and a fancy hairdo. It's a ball of laughs and totally fun!
Holy Crap! November 24, 2007
rygeltheXVI
2 out of 2 found this review helpful
I just got this book and I am going to race out and buy more copies to give as Christmas gifts. This book is a winner!
There has never been a Christmas Book as entertaining and f'd up at Sausagey Santa. Elf s3x! Christmas fetish! Snowmen with axes for limbs! This book is hilarious, poignant, and ultra smashing x-massey goodness.
I am so happy that there's a bizarro christmas book like this. And I love the cover!
THE Christmas book to read October 9, 2007
Shane Sterritt (Phoenix, AZ)
This is the best Christmas tale that I've read since How The Grinch Stole Christmas. This book is like a twisted Dr. Seuss for ADULTS.
The true story of Santa Claus is the story of Sausagey Santa; claims Decapitron, the main character's wife. According to her, Santa was a really bad guy who hated children and god punished him by giving him immortal life and making him spend an eternity bringing children joy and cheer. Actually, Sausagey Santa is a pretty sweet guy, kind of like a friendly pirate. He and Decapitron's family embark on an adventure to save Christmas from an evil Frosty the Snowman.
Filled with zombie snowmen, exploding reindeer, elf sex, christmas fetish-wear, sly guy hairstyles, and elves that are into Dungeons & Dragons; this book is spectacular, humorous and bizarro.
I am buying everyone I know I copy of this for Christmas this year!
|
|
|
